New Year’s Eve Morn.

12-31-2011

I had a ferocious day yesterday.  I worked from 6:30 in the morning to 9:30 last night. I got out three appraisals and believe that I did a good job on all three.  But it was hard to work through the stress and tension that coursed through my body.  I fought it most of the day; it was a roller coaster ride. But i have been on this ride before and today I managed to keep my butt in the saddle again and again. 

At 6:30 in the morning I was filled with optimism.  I had a very tight plan, step by step; I was going to make all my deadlines. It was doable as long as I stayed on tract. At 9 AM I got a call from Chase Bank that my check had bounced and I was two months late on my mortgage.  I am not going into all the details now but my day crumpled. Piece by piece, minute by minute, an hour on the phone to five different people at Chase … it all fell apart.  I tried deep breathing, I apologized to the folks I was talking to when I started to lose my temper.   One issue led to another, and to another and one by one I made things right. But I was MAD!!!

I discovered that I had seriously screwed up my bank account two weeks ago by not transferring money from my savings to my checking account. I had the money in one account but didn’t transfer it.  That’s all.

Since I got my new computer this summer I have been having trouble logging into my online banking.  I almost remember that being the issue. I probably thought that I would try it the next day … and then I didn’t do it.

I realize now that i was MAD already. I wake up every morning and look in the mirror and say, “Hi, my name is Annette Price and I am an Equine Gestalt Coach!!”  It is a GREAT way to start the day. But for the past three months I have been working long, long hours on real estate appraisals.  I am glad to be working. I can make money as an appraiser, have done it for years; but I have another vision now ……..

I have found so little time to be with my coaching business.  I cannot let the breath die away from “On the Wings of a Horse.”  She needs sustenance and I am afraid that I have not been feeding her. I need her to know how important she is to me.  Sometimes I lay in bed in the darkness of the very early morning and I visualize her, I see her wearing a t-shirt with our new logo on it. It looks good!

This morning is New Year’s Eve Morn.  The sun is shining even though the wind is blowing hard from the west. I tucked the hay I fed the horses into tubs and hoped that they would eat it before the wind could blow it to Kansas.  I have another appraisal that I CHOOSE to work on this morning but FIRST I sat in a quiet loving space and did REIKI on a friend in need, knowing that I was receiving even as I was giving. I wrapped myself up in soft fleecy sweats that feel like wearing a cloud. I ate five chocolate covered almonds that I had received for Christmas with my oatmeal this morning, just because I could.

I have spread totems around my house, in every room, so no matter where I go this day, I will be reminded of my commitment to my sweet new business, On the Wings of a Horse. With these I will nourish her. And she is feeding me as well. We are not alone. We are surrounded by our angels. We will not let the wind blow away that which sustains us. I CHOOSE to believe that this wind is clearing off the face of all that it sweeps over.  Great and wondrous treasures are waiting to be discovered.  I celebrate JOY.  Whew!!!!!