Thursday, November 27, 2014

A Tall Feathered Tale

Sometimes things happen when you least expect it and they can totally turn your day around. This was one of those times.

I was driving down Sugarloaf Mountain Road thinking about the state of my affairs,
which, if I had any thing to say about them, would be substantially different ~ Way Better ~ to be more specific. I came around a corner and what I saw before me was too weird to be true.

There was a man on a bicycle, moving rather slowly as he was pedaling  up   a steep incline. And running beside him was a long legged turkey.

I was shocked silly!

I pumped my brake pedal.

The turkey looked very tall;

the man looked very unhappy.


I rolled down my window and leaned out to get a better look. The poor man was trying to pedal even as the bird viciously pecked at him.  I casually asked him if this was his pet turkey. He had a hard time talking but he squawked something like, “this damn bird is trying to kill me!”

As I slowed my car beside them, the turkey was loudly vocal
and partially threw out his tail feathers into a fan.  He was dark brown, wild, and rather trim, apparently from jogging.  He appeared to be much more in control than his opponent ~ gobbling, fanning and pecking at the poor fellow !


The gentleman biker had grey hair under his little helmet, and shiny black bike shorts that fit tightly on his upper thighs leaving the rest of his poor leg exposed. I feel quite confident in assuming he had no idea when he dressed that day that he would be fending off,  or racing against,  a rabid running turkey.

Lest you think I am being unfair to the biker, he outweighed the bird by 150 pounds at least, and I will confess, under different circumstances, I would have found them both equally attractive specimens.


I wanted to yell some encouraging words to the man on the bike but I was struggling not to laugh out loud. It was tough; I was choking up as I wiped tears from my eyes.


As I slowly rolled down the road, the scene in my rear view mirror was so comical I nearly wet my pants. That long legged turkey ran beside the bike in a dead heat.

I believe the fellow was trying to throw a kick at the bird without losing momentum. The turkey, displaying a much keener sense of physical prowess and never missing a stride, would expand his tail feathers and then pull them back into a neat bundle.


I know it is cliché, but seriously,

the last thing I heard as I rolled around the next curve

was the man screaming curses

to which the turkey answered with a long gobble.



No matter what is going on in my life,

I would rather be the turkey than the biker.

August 25, 2009